Habits and How to Break Them

I was going through all of my old writings and happened upon this old motivation guide I had written down five years ago from a book that I found at the library. I don’t remember exactly what the book was called, I just remember that I had written the following down. I can’t say that this has helped me because I had forgotten about it, but it may help me in the future and I also hope that it will help others out. There are several sections to get through, so lots of patience is required. Good luck and let me know if you have read this before, have applied this to your life or if you are going to apply this to your life.

A Motivational Aide to Encourage You

You have the power to gain control over your bad habit no matter what it is.
Risks: Damages your self esteem or undermines your goals
Benefits: Immediate gratifications and release of stress
Understanding the Habit: Good and Bad

Ones you use the most become well worn and easy to follow
Doesn’t really decide to do it; just does it
Without habits we wouldn’t recieve the comfort that comes from the usual, the customary and the routine
Bad habits aren’t occasional and they aren’t harmless
Habit is an ingrained behavior
Low self esteem is both a cause and symptom of having a bad habit
It’s quite possible to be under stress, extremely busy and yet terribly bored at the same time and can be absolutely deadly when it comes to finding the motivation and strength to break a bad habit
Know you have strength and commitment to break your bad habit.
Why you do the things you do

You’ve never uncovered the root of the problem; the situations or feelings that trigger your bad habit
Seprate your true self from your bad habit. Realize and accept that you’re not your bad habit, nor are you a bad person for having it. It’s the habit that’s the problem, not your personality, your integirty or your will.
Most people develope bad habits as a defence against anxiety, as a way to relieve the physical and emotional side effects against stress.
You displace or transfer your reaction from it’s source to another behavior. And then you do it again and again because it works.
You have two basic options; you can reduce the source of anxiety or you can transfer/displace your reaction to a healthful behavior.
When you can’t give it up

Fear – the fear of coming face to face with “the new you” (despite or perhaps becuse of the power, potential and confidence you’ll then embrace) can certainly hold you back from getting started.
Subbornness
Self distruction – direct or indirect method of punishing or hurting yourself
Fear of failure – repeaed failures cause you to simply give up instead of attempting another, potentially more successful approach
Reasses your goals and the means you have to achieve them, emphasize your assets and move forward
Trying to do too much – except too much, too soon, can backfire
You have to “unlearn” the behavior
Letting it go, right now

Identify the behavior
Evaluate the risks and benefits
Prepare for change
Just do it!!
Let go of any anger and resentment you hold toward someone who has helped sow the seeds to your bad habit
Once you truly discern the pattern, you you can choose to break that pattern in the future
Won’t be able to break your bad habit until you recognize – before the fact – when you’re about to perform it.
Keeping a journal

No one should read it but you!
Avoid the triggers
Alleviate the triggers
Find a better way to cope
Daily Habit Log
Day:
Time:
Habit:
Activity:
Feeling:

Analyzing your daily journal

on the left hand side, write the following; morning, afternoon, evening
on the top write; what I did, habit alert, how I felt after, I could have done
and at they way bottom, write; How I did today.
Risk Benefit Analysis

My Compulsion
My First Time
Current Triggers
Risks
Benefits

Loosing Your Cool

Anger is the dangerous form of miscommunication

Keeping a positive attitude is important for achieving your goals and maintaining successful relationships

First step is to admit your feelings and then to explore what’s behind them

The object of your rage is not always the underlying problem

Talk to the source of your anger when you aren’t feeling angry, ask how you can fix the situation so you won’t fly off the handle and say something you don’t mean

Imagine yourself in the other person’s shoes

Leave the situations until you cool off

Avoid people and situations that irritate you

Before you talk, take a minute to breathe deeply, relax and think about the best way to handle the situation

Can keep a daily anger management log

You may find that you’re taking anger out on people you love, failing to directly address the source

Practice stress management

Exercise

Less sugar and caffeine

Don’t overplan

Breathe deeply

Get enough sleep
The Fine Art of Sharing

Pay Attention
Stop interrupting and finishing others thoughts
Break unhealthful patterns
When Someone You Love Has A Bad Habit

Stepping in gingerly;
Chose the right time, place and mood
Identify
Express gently
Ask how the habit affects your loved one
Ask if your loved one’s ready and willing to make a change
Find out how you can help – if you want to
Move forward together

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